I Suppose I Should Write My Will Chapter 5 - Official Novel

Chapter 5

  A blue cloak embroidered with silver thread fluttered behind his long strides. Duke Dieren Spear had appeared far more impeccably attired than he had during the expedition’s return parade.

  As he strode through the corridors of the imperial palace without hesitation, servants and knights alike paused at the sight of Dieren before bowing low. As the Empire’s most powerful man and its most handsome, the Duke drew attention wherever he went. To Dieren, such gazes were all too familiar, and all too tiresome. Expressionless, he kept his eyes straight ahead, bound for his destination.

  I would have preferred to stay at the estate if nothing had happened at the border. But between the banquet and the social season, it’s one annoyance after another.

  He hadn’t expected any proper rest upon his return. Yet even though he had braced himself before returning to the manor, facing the mountain of delayed work still gave him a headache. It was all because of his uncle, who still acted as if he were the master of the duchy.

  Rather than caring about his nephew’s well-being, Dieren’s uncle had been busy boasting about his contributions to the imperial banquet preparations and his role in managing the duchy’s finances.

  “Everyone will be paying attention to us at this imperial banquet! That attention will carry all the way through the social season!”

  Unable to listen any longer, Dieren snapped at his uncle in a voice thick with disgust.

  “Enough, Uncle. Unless you wish for me to drop dead from all this work.”

  “Is that any way to speak to your elders…? Fine, fine, I shall hold my tongue.”

  Dieren had risen from heir apparent to head of the duchy at the age of nineteen. He had demanded that his uncle accord him proper respect as the family head and address him formally. Back then, his uncle’s face had turned red as he blustered that the boy lacked affection, saying he knew no gratitude and was a bitter disappointment. Ever since then, he tried to look down on Dieren whenever he got the chance.

  Through his uncle, Dieren had realized how difficult it was to maintain the dignity, respect, and consideration for others that his parents had taught him.

  The affectations and selfishness of arrogant nobles and imperial royals, especially those who piggybacked on the power of others, were no different from his uncle’s. The more he encountered people who sought only their own self-interest, the firmer Dieren’s weary indifference became.

  Yesterday and today, Dieren had chosen silence and disregard. Whether to his rambling uncle, to the knight commander asking why he had broken away from the parade, or to the butler confirming his schedule for visiting the imperial court, he always gave half-hearted answers or ignored them altogether.

  The emperor, however, was a different matter. Dieren paused briefly right before entering the emperor’s office. Only after exhaling a long sigh did he step through the open door.

  Beyond the open windows, a lush green landscape stretched out beneath the clear spring sky. Budding flowers and the massive fountain visible beyond them formed a magnificent scene.

  Yet despite the brilliant backdrop of the office and the emperor’s warm welcome, Dieren’s eyes remained hollow and his face impassive. Even a full day after returning, he had still not recovered from his exhaustion.

  Dieren approached the emperor, sank onto one knee, and lowered his head with an arm crossed over his chest. The emperor stepped forward and rested the edge of his hand above Dieren’s head in formal acknowledgment.

  “May God’s grace be upon Your Imperial Majesty, the light of the Empire. Dieren Spear has returned from the expedition to the border region with the Peiri Kingdom.”

  “Well done. Though that handsome face of yours looks a bit worn.”

  “…”

  At the emperor’s jesting greeting, Dieren knitted his brows into a small frown. He had no intention of hiding his discomfort.

  The emperor, past forty, looked upon the impudent young duke with fond amusement. He considered Dieren’s unpretentious demeanor a great virtue.

  While Duke Spear was hardly cooperative with the emperor or the court, he was ironically someone who put the emperor’s mind at ease. Unlike nobles who raised their voices or shifted allegiances based on court ties, the young duke, far more interested in external affairs, was a comforting presence. Moreover, as a blood relative from a branching family, the emperor could not help but cherish this nephew young enough to be his son.

  The emperor moved to sit across from Dieren.

  “That cursed land has always been a matter of great concern to you, Duke. Has anything changed?”

  “The fog has grown worse, making entry impossible. I couldn’t find so much as an animal track. However, I did encounter the Imperial Knights of the Melkin Empire to the south.”

  “So Melkin was unable to take any action either?”

  “I received reports that there was no noticeable change along the border between the kingdom and the Melkin Empire. Ever since their Imperial knight commander went missing after recklessly entering during the winter, they seem to be treading very carefully.”

  “They’re finally exercising caution, I see. It seems they still covet that land.”

  Just before the late emperor passed away, minor and major tensions between the Nodlen and Melkin Empires had ultimately erupted into war. Having suffered the loss of countless nobles and soldiers, the late emperor had been deeply shaken, leaving a will that explicitly urged his successor to avoid war. Honoring this, the current Emperor relied on the Empire’s scale while working to consolidate its internal strength.

  The Peiri Kingdom was a troublesome matter for the Nodlen Empire. Given their shared border, they had clearly been allies, but there were no longer any royal family members left to speak of such treaties. The fog that had spread across the entire kingdom like mold showed no sign of clearing.

  Though the Melkin Empire was said to be searching for a solution, no news had come from them either. During this expedition, Dieren had merely surveyed the cursed land and returned. And no one knew why Dieren, who possessed everything and seemed interested in nothing, was so obsessively fixated on that place.

  “Why are you so interested in that small kingdom?”

  It was natural to find it puzzling that the Duke had volunteered for long-term expeditions two years in a row. The Peiri Kingdom was a land that Melkin paid far more attention to than Nodlen did. Melkin treated it almost as its own territory, keeping a reconnaissance team directly dispatched by their Imperial House stationed there continuously.

  “When I was young, the former Duke always emphasized the significance of that sacred kingdom’s existence. The Duchy also shared special ties with them. Furthermore, I believe it necessary to prevent conflicts with the Melkin Empire. Should any changes occur, our Empire must be prepared to respond.”

  Though he offered plausible reasons, they were merely excuses to justify his actions. The entire time he spoke, Dieren felt an ache in his chest.

  Realizing he could not enter that land unprepared left him with a hollow sense of futility. It felt as though his dream had crumbled right before his eyes when his goal was within reach. The girl who had enabled him to live as himself, along with the rest of the royal family, had vanished. The result of the expedition was, as ever, chaos. Even if the Peiri Kingdom were freed from its curse, it might bring him no benefit whatsoever.

  And yet, despite that, his desire to restore that land remained absolute. Perhaps because he had longed for it blindly for so long, he could think of nothing else.

  “It couldn’t have been easy for you to leave your post vacant.”

  Dieren understood well what the emperor meant. Reminded that nothing in his situation was settled, that chaos reigned inside and outside the Duchy, and even within his own heart, his expression darkened further.

  “I am not to fully reclaim authority from my uncle until year’s end, so I asked him to handle matters while I was away.”

  “Ah, your uncle.”

  The emperor started to speak further of Dieren’s uncle, then changed the subject.

  “Right, there are nobles interested in the fallen kingdom. Count Burnett in particular has been quite proactive. Since he volunteered to serve on the investigation team, I shall arrange a meeting between the two of you at the banquet.”

  “Understood.”

  Dieren recalled what he knew of Count Burnett and sifted through his memories. The land governed by the Count lay close to the Peiri Kingdom, but for some reason he had entrusted its management to a viscount and was staying long-term at his manor in the capital. Should they meet at the upcoming banquet, there would be much to discuss. Memories, as well as talk regarding the Peiri Kingdom.

  As he sank into thought for a moment, the emperor brought up an intriguing topic.

  “I heard there was quite a commotion during the return parade. The Empress was so amused.”

  “Ah…”

  “Word has it that you found your ideal type, your fateful beloved, and leapt off your horse.”

  Dieren closed his eyes slowly, then opened them. Annoyance settled over his rigid face.

  “It is a baseless rumor.”

  “Though it is true you broke away from the parade.”

  It seemed the rumor had already reached the imperial palace.

  Faced with a topic he wanted to avoid, Dieren bit his lip, looking thoroughly fed up. When he gave no proper response to the rumor’s contents, the emperor asked playfully,

  “What happened? What could make the young Duke Spear act so strangely?”

  “I thought I saw a familiar face, but I was mistaken.”

  “So it wasn’t your fateful beloved?”

  “Of course not… I thought it was a childhood friend. It was not.”

  “How boring. The Empress almost joined us because of it. I had a terrible time stopping her.”

  “I wonder how Her Majesty the Empress is faring as well.”

  His deadpan tone made it plain he was not the least bit curious about her well-being. Holding back a chuckle, the emperor nodded. He was thoroughly glad he had stopped the Empress back then. Fortunately, she had quickly conceded when he asked if she truly wanted to risk Dieren skipping the banquet altogether.

  Like the other nobles, the Empress took a keen interest in Dieren’s social life every year. She was thrilled at the prospect of finding a match perfectly suited for him at the banquet and the upcoming debutante ball.

  The emperor was equally interested in Dieren’s future moves, including his marriage prospects. However, seeing his tightly set lips and annoyed expression, he worried that Dieren would once again drain a single glass of wine and vanish during this social season as well.

  Up until last year, whenever the social season began, Dieren did nothing more than show his face to the emperor before vanishing. Many lamented his total refusal to participate in social events. Instead, Dieren’s uncle had frequented social gatherings as though he were Dieren’s proxy. The possibility of the same thing happening this year was far from zero. The emperor shook his head as he recalled Dieren’s uncle raising his voice at the council of nobles.

  “At any rate, I am glad you returned safely. I expect you to attend in person starting from the next council meeting.”

  “Understood.”

  “Make a grand entrance at the banquet. You must capture the attention of every noble, young and old, male and female alike. Is that not the burden of a young, unmarried duke?”

  Recalling a few familiar nobles, Dieren blinked his tired eyes. Whenever imperial events took place, Dieren had let his uncle run loose. It was his way of showing minimum courtesy to demonstrate that the Duchy did not disregard the imperial family. His uncle was useful for taking care of such bothersome matters.

  At any rate, it was indeed an important banquet, just as the emperor had said. The banquet welcoming the expedition would serve as the prelude to the social season. Dieren intended to show his face, empty a single glass of wine, and quietly disappear. Just as he always had.